A grandma’s nightmare

My grandson was born 3 weeks early so he was small. 6lbs 8 ozs. My daughters first baby and our first grandchild. One of the happiest days of our lives.

From the first day we all noticed a popping feeling when we picked him up. We were assured it was "normal". By the second day we noticed the hospital ID band had dug into his leg (leaving a scar that was still visible when he was 2 yrs old). Again we were assured he was ok

At his first 3 wellness checks there were no concerns.

He was the best baby except at feeding time he was inconsolable. Screaming and pulling his little legs up. My daughter tried different formulas. But nothing helped. And this little guy never had a solid bowel movement.

When he was 3 weeks old he was circumcised. Every diaper was lathered in Vaseline. At the 3 week follow up the doctor said because the skin hadn't been pulled back enough he had to "redo" the procedure. We were all devastated. My grandson was a little trooper. So again for the next 3 weeks his diaper was lathered in Vaseline. My daughter was terrified to have the diaper stick and cause any pain.

My grandson over the next 3 weeks saw his family doctor twice and another follow up with the doctor who did the circumcision. So in his first 6 weeks of life had seen a medical professional 7 times and not one of them had any concerns with him

Even though he wasn't gaining a lot of weight my daughter was assured he was a healthy baby and he was just colicky. She had tried another 2 kinds of formula but nothing was helping during feeding. But all medical experts who saw him said he was doing well.

She questioned the popping we could all still feel when we picked him up. And again she was assured it was normal.

3 days after his last follow up with circumcision doctor my daughter went to change my grandson’s first diaper of the day. She called me in a panic. Said the skin on his scrotum looked like it was torn. There was no blood. But she wanted to get it checked out she didn't want him getting an infection because he was still not having solid bowel movements. She rushed him to our local hospital.

The emergency doctor decided it needed to be stitched, which shocked my daughter. As there was no blood. They gave the baby amoxicillin. He immediately vomited yellow and became drowsy. This is when our nightmare started.

The hospital then called CAS and the police.

When I arrived at the hospital the nurse told me my grandson had brain damage and they were sending him to a larger hospital.

They wouldn't allow my daughter to go in the ambulance with her tiny baby.

The police went and searched her place and took her boyfriend in for questioning.

My daughter and I drove the 2 hours to the hospital. There we were met by a detective who questioned us both. He decided we weren't suspects and let us in.

We had so many people coming in telling us this baby had been abused. We had no idea what was going on. My grandson never had a mark on him and NO ONE had hurt him. Yet they were telling us he had a broken leg and broken ribs. Luckily despite what our local hospital had said there was no brain damage.

2 days later CAS called my daughter and said we had to leave the hospital immediately or the police would remove us as we were both suspects now.

They put my grandson into foster care and no one could see him unsupervised. Despite a lot of family saying they would take him, they still put him in foster care.

My daughter started to try and find answers. We knew my mom had been diagnosed with a 50 % bone density at the age of 50. My family also had issues with their teeth. My mom had dentures at 18 after having me. And I had a lot of dental issues during my pregnancy and after having my children. And during her pregnancy my daughter had issues as well causing a lot dental work needing to be done

We found the amazing group called Fractured Families and reached out to 6 expert doctors.

My daughter’s lawyer had to fight in court to get my grandson’s medical records but once he finally got them and they were able to be sent for the doctors to review we finally got some answers. My daughter went and got her blood work done (this was 12 weeks after my grandson was born). To our surprise she was Vitamin D deficient. My daughter and I also met with a doctor and after some testing we were both diagnosed with hypermobile EhlersDanslos Syndrome (hEDS) - a connective tissues disorder that effects all tissues in the body, including bones, skin etc.

All 6 experts said it was clear that my grandson had what's called infantile rickets. This was because he was born severely Vitamin D deficient. Since Canada does not test pregnant women's Vitamin D levels, we had no way of knowing how low my daughter’s Vitamin D level was her entire pregnancy.

The doctors explained my grandson’s bones were not fully developed - his bones were underdeveloped and fragile. When his body started to get its own Vitamin D, his bones would finish properly developing and strengthen. His skin was already sensitive because of his hEDS and adding the Vaseline for 6 weeks caused it to be even more sensitive

My daughter was in a fight with CAS. Going to court every month. All the lawyer fees forced my husband and I to spend our savings and remortgage our house but we had to prove this baby was never abused and was loved and well taken care of.

He was kept in foster care for 10 weeks and then a safety plan was made, only because a judge ordered it. CAS who claim to want to keep families together was actually fighting to keep ours apart. 17 month later my daughter was finally given back full custody. And CAS agreed to disagree as they would not believe our experts. Even with 6 of them with all different degrees and expertise in their fields.

My grandson’s father was arrested and charged 15 months after the nightmare started. The original CAP (child abuse paediatrician) still won't admit he was wrong. It has not gone to trial and we are almost at the 5 year mark.